A week long ban because I had one fan-art in the gallery. Gotta love justice. Well, I hated drawing and I hated drawing for people anyway so what do I lose? Nothing! I simply got used and canned all over again for like the what hundred time? Oh, well, nothing in this life that's good lasts long and this was getting old. Just like me. Saint Joanne watch over France, Saint Lawrence over comedians, Saint Michael over soldiers and some Saint up there watch over the moderators who would ban you off the site just because you misread something without being given an explantion. As Rolf Steiner used to say, Long Live Death, Long Live War. Peace and Love suck balls.

Hey @TurkeyOnAStick don't fall of your chair because of this but as you can see, Kino used to be my pen-name, I go by Maz here because it's more unique. That and I met another Kino.

Alright, this is seriously off the leash and uncalled for. I got banned without any explanation, no message, no nothing. I don't even know if it's perma-banned or what. I just know that someone that "could do it" did it and banned me because they thought that's ok.

I came to NG specifically avoiding the shitfest /co/ became or the dread of Twitter and now I'm banned for no friggin' reason?

Alright, now my thread got deleted?!? Were I given a reason I'd probably understand and move on, but seriously, what the fuck? This seems like a personal beef now and I'll have to walk on egg shells unless I want the full on power of a neckbeard playing Einsatzkommando on a fucking internet forum.

Got a thread locked because some dickwad mod thought it was a "sympathy" thread when it was just a question...

Mods = Dicks

NG =/= 4chan

Mods = Jannies = Dicks

Yeah, mods are dicks anywhere!

I've been doing something right.... right?

But seriously, thank you all for your support and love.

• Maz

Lately I've been questioned if I'm uploading "other people's art"

Short answer is no.

Long answer is:

Most of the "good art" I uploaded is minimum two years old, It's stuff I did with my friends taking the lead in some projects, currently I'm working on Sad Girl which, I don't feel it should have a "better art style" it's a dumb OC made to mock me with a dumb comic and a dumb and easy art style (Think Jerry Jackson)

On the other hand I can't have the luxury of spending a week on a drawing because I'm 2/3rds of the day busy, I'm an adult woman with a life, responsibilities and all that shit that gets in the way at the worst times.

So yeah, maybe I would love to add some shading to my latest piece or get better at drawing heads but I get obstacles in life, I have a family to support. And frankly being implied an art thief is demoralising.

To compare this

With this:

Is simply null and void. I'm not 18 anymore, if I were to draw a good piece and upload it, I'd do it without much fanfare. But as artists with whom I collabed with can attest, I always give credit where it is due.

I feel whenever I say I'll quit art I just wait twelve hours to come back harder than before!

For now I'll focus on some sketches I had on my paper pile.

After being asked three times in a row if it's my first time drawing or just being told bluntly that I suck my brain clicked the "I gotta get good".... and I ended up burning a folder with sketches. If drawing ain't something I'm good at, maybe some day I'll reincarnate in one of those fucked up flammentruppen burning down villages and shit. I'm a piece of shit anyway, so who cares about the morals? Had I cared before I wouldn't be alone now thinking about ending it all with a bang. Whimpering. Shit.

Woke up.

Sober.

I'll try not to overdo my meds.

Best nap ever.

Woke up horny as all fuck.