'...I'm thinking about ending it all. Some say this is extreme, but it's the only route left...'
No. That's not true at all. Suicide is never the 'last' route left. In fact, you should never, ever even classificate it as a 'route to follow', in first place. You can't give up just like that. You must have to keep going with your life, no matter what happens. Try any type of ideas that passes through your mind to not only distract yourself from those thoughts, but also to try to 'bump' yourself out of all this mess; try seeking for a new job to maintain yourself and your family, try to seek for help (as finantial help from the government, or perhaps a therapist for you to try to support you anyhow in this case), try to begin with your career as an artist once again and try to draw for commisions so you can gain some extra money from that... try anything, except this, please. Because seriously, that 'path' which you're currently thinking about choosing isn't going to lead you anywhere. Give life another chance. Stay strong.
I hope that this comment helps you to think 'twice' about it, and also, I wish you luck so everything that has happened to you until now does a '360-degree-flip' and the 'destiny' somehow can give it back to you in form of 'good events' and 'successes' from now own. A strong hug, and much encouragement. You got this.
Squidster491
No… please… don’t do this… I care about you. Frankly, most people on this website do too.
Mazooe
Let's be realistic (and honest) I'm just a whiny wannabe artist with no talent, even my friends left me. I give nothing and leaving I take nothing away from anyone. I know it's selfish, but it would be, for the first time in my life, a choice I would be happy with.